a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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