question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
is wine microwaveable?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
