WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Randomize
