I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Alive.
So much puke
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
