So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
