remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
