The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
