Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize