I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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