I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
