I think I am morally bankrupt
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
