please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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