Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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