Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize
