Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize