wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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