Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
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mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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