I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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