i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
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If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
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Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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