Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize