My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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