Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize