He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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