It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize