Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Randomize
