Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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