you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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