Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(650): View more from California

Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..

(1-650): View more from California

You've kissed worse.

Fav 3 2623 851
share tweet
(802): View more from Vermont

Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?

Fav 7 2635 832
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(585): View more from New York

lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time

Fav 9 5033 883
share tweet
(201): View more from New Jersey

The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint

Fav 15 4905 1269
share tweet
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(708): View more from Illinois

Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.

Fav 15 4694 1782
share tweet
(203): View more from Connecticut

I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.

Fav 35 6546 2508
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(973): View more from New Jersey

Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.

Fav 91 2127 25186
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(303): View more from Colorado

You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness

Fav 0 967 617
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(740): View more from Ohio

I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.

Fav 5 1074 663
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT