I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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