dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
You are the jesus of drinking
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize