I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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