I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize