It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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