So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
