before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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