I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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