I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
