People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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