He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
