Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize