you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
