I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
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