If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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