I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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