How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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