It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
