im gay
i know
yea but for you.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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