you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
