So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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