i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Randomize
