I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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